Changing Times

I came across this quote recently - “I do not believe that friends are necessarily the people you like best, they are merely the people who got there first.” Peter Ustinov.

I started thinking whether this possibly could be true.

Given our social need to mingle and mix with people, we form social bonds with fellow human beings. Of course, the level of bonding varies from functional (you and your accountant), need driven (you and your pesky neighbor), social obligations (your classmates or colleagues who you would rather ignore) to this type called ‘friends’. This bond needs no further explanation.

But is it necessary that the friends you have known the longest are the ones who you necessarily like the most? On the other hand, is it necessary, that you are friends with someone because they merely ‘got to you first’? A flashback to the first lecture of my under graduate program was a clear eye opener for me. Yes – my friends today are the ones who got to me first. However, they aren’t my closest friends.

It was a startling realization. I started looking for examples around me which could be explained by the ‘got there first’ syndrome.

One early bird which comes to mind is the ‘Ambassador’ from Hindustan Motors (HM). For close to 40 years, everyone who wanted a diesel automobile in India befriended this car. ‘Premier Padmini’ was the only other option available but it lost to the ‘Ambassador’ in terms of being sturdy and spacious. HM had the ‘got there first’ advantage so to say but somewhere they became complacent and took their relation with customers for granted. Instead of evolving with the customers and their changing needs, the ‘Ambassador’ stayed the same.

When Maruti entered the market in the 1980’s, Indians quickly befriended Maruti. Within no time, Ambassador had lost its leadership position to Maruti. Moral of the story is that people (customers) sometimes befriend certain people (brands) due to absence of other people (brands) to befriend.

The friend, the brand in this context, should not take the relation for granted. The longevity of a relation does not necessarily ensure loyalty or strength of commitment. If the brand does not evolve, adapt or grow with the customer, the friendship starts to wither. The customers will hang around only because they have to and not because they want to. The early bird definitely got the worm and lost the butterfly!

Another first mover that comes to mind is ‘Acuvue’.

In early 1980’s, the Vistakon unit of J&J sold contact lens only meant for astigmatism, and were an expensive proposition. When they came upon an ophthalmologist in Copenhagen who had conceived a way to manufacture contact lenses inexpensively – J&J got to work. They bought rights to the product and set up a high speed manufacturing facility. The company got a 6 month head start over the competitors such as Bausch and Lomb and Ciba-Geigy. J&J not only brought in a new product, they also marketed it differently. They marketed the product to eye care professionals and end consumers as well. Even today, ‘Acuvue’ is the clear market leader. The competition was never able to catch up.

As a leader, you need to continually be on the lookout to better the solution to the problem your product is solving instead of becoming lethargic. Even today, J&J is continually working towards developing a better product and also towards some technologies which would make contact lenses obsolete.

‘Acuvue’, which is the friend in this context, is seen as someone who understands your needs better than everyone else. It would be quite difficult for a Bausch and Lomb to convince customers that they are better than J&J. It’s a clear case of that first friend being, and continuing to be your best friend!

With every new person who gets included in your social circle (a new brand launch), there is always an undercurrent of changing dynamics. There is no way for you to limit the interactions between two people. The only solution therefore, is to be totally cognizant of the state of mind your friend is in. The relation you have had till now will hold you in good stead for a while. If the new friend does enter the coterie, the secret is to quickly grow in the dimension that is missing in you currently; the dimension which made the new friend attractive in the first place.

The longer the relationship, the more change a friendship is bound to see. Every relationship needs work. The friend could have been with you since pre-school but if he fails to understand your needs and wants as a young professional today; the relationship will slowly change and possibly fade. The friend who observes this change and responds to accommodate the change is the one who will have the stronger relationship.

It is a disconcerting discovery that you as friend are under the scanner, but looks like Peter Ustinov was right after all.